


When The Wind Blows

by TheRealBurgerKing



Series: I will love you, always [1]
Category: TXT - Fandom
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Based on the story of When I'm Gone by Joey + Rory, Beomgyu is 23 and Soobin is 24, Cancer, M/M, Sick Character, Specifically Ewing's Sarcoma (bone cancer)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-30
Updated: 2020-05-30
Packaged: 2021-03-03 01:21:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,023
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24462691
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheRealBurgerKing/pseuds/TheRealBurgerKing
Summary: Love can last a lifetime - even when life is too short.
Relationships: Choi Beomgyu/Choi Soobin
Series: I will love you, always [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1766917
Comments: 4
Kudos: 29





	When The Wind Blows

The lock clicked open as Soobin turned the key in the doorknob and a small dog’s snuffling got louder. He turned the knob and pushed the door open, shuffling through and pushing it closed behind him, mindful of the sandy-furred terrier at his feet. “Hey, Sean” Soobin patted the dog’s head as he toed off his shoes and hung his coat up.

The house was silent, save for the muted hum of the tv playing some drama in the next room. Soobin padded into the room, dropped the bag of medicine and snacks clutched in his hand on a nearby table and approached the couch. Looking from behind, he could see the light green scarf Beomgyu had wrapped around his head that morning. Soobin called to him softly, “Honey, I’m home”, hoping to not scare him. But the actually-sleeping Beomgyu didn’t reply, instead mumbling gibberish.

Soobin laughed quietly and sat on the couch next to him, smiling to himself. “23 years old and you still haven’t grown.” Beomgyu’s eyebrows knit and for a moment, Soobin was scared the boy-man had woken and heard him. But a second later, Beomgyu’s face relaxed and he rolled toward the older man, preferring the new source of heat to being alone.

Soobin happily accepted his boyfriend into his arms, settling his tiny body on his lap. He felt a familiar ache in his heart as he pressed kisses to Beomgyu’s cute face. _Just a few months, baby._ Soobin kissed his button nose. _That’s all I have with you._ He lifted the little frame and carried him to the bedroom.

***

Faint birdsong accompanied the occasional crack of gravel as Soobin pushed Beomgyu’s wheelchair up the sidewalk. The couple had just arrived at Hongneung Arboretum for a picnic. Beomgyu hugged their basket to his chest, smiling widely as he dropped his head back. He closed his eyes and hummed in contentment as the sun warmed his face. Being in and out of the hospital and not feeling well from chemotherapy meant he rarely went outside.

Soobin paused at the gate to pick up a pair of garden shears offered by the Arboretum. Hopefully, a pretty bouquet could brighten Beomgyu’s home life. The Arboretum was quiet for a Saturday, but Soobin wasn’t complaining. All he wanted to hear right now was nature, and maybe the sound of children laughing in the distance. He and Beomgyu had always wanted to start a family together.

Soobin headed straight to the forest corner of the Arboretum. Tall trees grew there with lots of grass and few people. They would be undisturbed. Beomgyu oohed and aahed at every flower, brushing his hands through the leaves.

Arriving at a nice, shaded area under a large Japanese Pagoda tree, Soobin made quick work of laying out their blanket. He knelt in front of the wheelchair and hooked his arms under Beomgyu’s, pulling the boy to his chest. He turned and settled the smaller on the blanket, back against the tree trunk. Beomgyu sighed softly, giving Soobin a little smile and pursing his lips for a kiss. Soobin was happy to give him what he wanted.

The couple relaxed, eating their sandwiches and listening to the breeze in the leaves. With Beomgyu so close to him, his familiar lavender scent wafted by Soobin’s nose. Soobin turned his head and buried his face in Beomgyu’s hair. Breathing. Just breathing. He never wanted to forget how it felt to have his beloved in his arms.

Beomgyu giggled, “If you wanted cuddles, you just have to ask.” He pulled himself into Soobin’s lap, sitting sideways and nuzzling his nose into Soobin’s collarbones. The older held him close, cheek rested on his head. Even here, in this moment, he could feel his Beomgyu slipping farther away. With each shaky breath, each touch of a trembling hand, the time to say goodbye drew closer.

_I hope you know - I love you so, so much._

***

The only sound that could be heard in the darkness of the hall was the patter of raindrops outside. They echoed in Soobin’s soul as he laid next to Beomgyu on their big bed. The young man was softly breathing, chest rising and falling slowly. His eyes were closed but he wasn’t asleep. Merely, it was too tiring to simply open them.

The chemotherapy treatments had ended two months ago. And now, Beomgyu was letting go. His everything hurt; he was so weary. He just wanted to sleep.

Soobin held Beomgyu’s weak body against his own, leaving kisses that were barely felt on pale skin. “I don’t know if you can still hear me, but… you will always be my every day.”

Beomgyu forced his eyes open and blearily met Soobin’s. He squeezed their hands. “I know you’ll think of me” he whispered, “but you’ll be okay each night and day. Please smile when you think of me. Just give it time; we’ll both be fine.” He took a few more breaths, chest tightening.

Tears crept down Soobin’s cheeks as he hugged Beomgyu close, breathing in the lavender scent.

He didn’t have to raise his head to know when he was left alone that night.

***

_The next few nights were hard, as expected. I stayed at my friends’ houses, unable to be at home. It was quiet, far too quiet. I couldn’t face it. Evening meant sleeping alone and dawn meant waking alone. Beomgyu was buried in the neighborhood cemetery, in a little plot with lots of flowers. It was beautiful. It will remain beautiful, as long as I am tending to it._

_But I can’t avoid our house forever._

***

_I stood on our back porch, listening to the whippoorwills and crickets. Fireflies danced before me, lighting up the dark. Beomgyu loved this time of year, mostly because of the fireflies. I remember even before we were together, he would bring me jars of the little bugs. My head is filled with thoughts of him, memories of what used to be. I take a deep breath and close my eyes._

_When the wind blows, a faint scent of lavender lingers by my nose and I go back again._


End file.
